Christian Pick-Up Lines

 

Something happens when Christians start to date.  There are two extremes.  One group tries to over spiritualize everything, and the other group unfortunately  just takes God completely out of the equation.

Let me show you what it looks like when somebody is trying to over-spiritualize a situation.

Just a simple Google search of “Christian pick up lines” will show you what I am talking about.  Here are a few I found:

  1. “God told me to come talk to you.”
  2. “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
  3. “You don’t have an accountability partner? Well, me neither.”
  4. “Would you happen to know a Christian woman who I could love with all of my heart, and wait on hand and foot?”
  5. “Excuse me, but I believe one your ribs belongs to me.”
  6. “My friend told me to come and meet you, he said you were a really nice person, I think you know him, Jesus, yeah, that’s his name.”
  7. “I didn’t believe in predestination until I met you.”
  8. “Hi.  My name’s Will.  God’s Will.”
  9. “Your name must be Grace, because you’re irresistible.”
  10. “Hey, I was looking through the Book of Numbers and realized I didn’t have yours.”
  11. “I was commanded to feed the hungry so should I say dinner at 8?”
  12. “If I walked around you 7 times, would you fall for me?”
  13. “Christians don’t shake hands.  Christians gotta hug!”
  14. “Oh, you are cold?  I was reading in my quiet time today and Ecclesiastes 4:11 asked, ‘how can one keep warm alone?'”
  15. “Is it a sin that you stole my heart?”
  16. “Do you believe in divine appointments?”
  17. “Excuse me, is this pew taken?”
  18. “Has anyone ever told you that your eyes are like doves, your hair like a flock of goats, and your neck like the tower of David? (Song of Solomon 4)”
  19. [While checking the person’s shirt tag] “Just as I thought – made in heaven.”
  20. “God was showing off when he made you.”
  21. “I’m pretty flexible.  I don’t think a woman should be submissive on the first date.”

And I don’t know if you’ve ever heard these or if anyone has ever tried to use them on you, but if they ever do you need to just run for your life.

Run, run, run for your life.

1 thought on “Christian Pick-Up Lines”

  1. How about “God told me that we are going to get married “? Honest, a former classmate in college said it. I think it actually worked to get him a date.

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