The biggest decision of your life is choosing whether or not to follow Jesus.
The second biggest decision of your life is choosing who to walk beside as you follow Jesus.
If you are single, someone may have told you to come up with a list of non-negotiables that must be present for you to consider a person as a potential spouse. Here is the list I would recommend:
- Has a vibrant and growing relationship with Jesus
- Has the wisdom to make biblically-guided decisions
- Has an eager desire to serve a local church
- Has the resolve to fight against temptation
- Has a diligent commitment to using his or her opportunities well
- Has a close base of godly relationships
- Has acknowledgment of personal shortcomings
This is a list. You could probably come up with some I neglected. Make your own list.
As you look at this list, could you make this a start for non-negotiables for a potential spouse?
Now, here is the curveball:
Are you able to meet the criteria you expect a potential spouse to meet?
What I often find is singles who have a very thorough list of expectations of which they cannot personally meet. Do you think you can hold someone to a higher standard than what you show? I am not hoping you will alter this list, on the contrary, raise the bar even more if you need to improve it. But as you wait for that perfect person, are you making personal progress?
If you are waiting for Mr. Right, he rarely makes the time for Mrs. Wrong. If you are looking for Mrs. Right, she normally avoids Mr. Wrong.
I am all about making a list of essentials. Let it weed out people with whom you do not need to waste time. But realize that the ideal candidate will not be interested in someone who has been twiddling their fingers waiting around.
Before making a list of the type of spouse you want, why not start preparing to become the type of person that your future spouse will need?