Posts Tagged ‘ international adoption

Adoption FAQ #5: “How Expensive?”

As we are still waiting word of a travel date to go to Ethiopia to unite with our son, I am still having a great time answering questions concerning adoption for inquiring minds.  One of the most frequent questions we have received is “How expensive is one of those babies?” or “Why do they cost so much?”

First off, babies don’t cost money.  You pay for many legal fees, but you do not pay for the child.  In typical adoption expenses, you must pay for home studies, passports, legal paperwork, and so much more.  The list is very long, but all these fees add up to a substantial amount.

Second, there is not much financial discrepancy between domestic adoption and international adoption.  Actually, some recent figures say that international adoption costs can range from $7,000 to $30,000.  Shockingly, domestic adoption fees can range from from $5,000 to $40,000.  That’s right – some domestic adoption fees are greater than some international adoption fees.  The difference being what type of agency and what type of stipulations you put on they type of child you want to adopt.  If you want to go the DSS adoption route, most fees are taken care of, but private agencies will cost you.

Third, while those fees seem a tad overwhelming to some families, the cost to adopt a child is less in most cases than the purchase of most automobiles.  Most people’s cars cost more than what it would take to bring a precious child into their home to find their forever family.  Yes, the fees are a huge commitment and sacrifice, but in light of what we spend money on, it’s not that much.

Fourth, God is not short on cash.  If you believe God leading you to adopt, God will provide the resources.  God has stretched our faith over these months, and we have been amazed at every step of the way concerning how God provides.  It’s been a wonderful partnership of God providing money we weren’t expecting and our willingness to do a little bit more and save a little bit more on our part.  God provided and we were willing to sacrifice.  We have always had enough due to God’s faithfulness.  I wish I had time to tell you all the stories of how He has showed up and done exceedingly abundantly more than what we could think or ask of Him (Eph 3:20).

If your finances are in trouble and you want to adopt, let one of these precious children be the stimulus to get your finances in shape.  To adopt, people comb through your finances relentlessly, so in order for some to adopt, you are going to need to clean some things up first.  Here are some steps to get you started:

  • Plan a monthly budget – Work with your spouse and spend every dollar on paper before you actually spend it.  See where your extra is going.
  • Mint.com – We just started using this online site a couple of weeks ago, but this FREE service from the people at Turbo Tax that can help evaluate your fiances and get you on track.
  • Crown Financial Class – North Side is offering Crown Financial classes that are starting this Sunday.  It is a 10 week study that will transform your finances.  Call the church office to sign up.
  • Financial Counseling – Did you know that we have North Side staff members that have been through Dave Ramsey training?  We have people on staff that will work with you for free to get a handle on your finances.
  • Scholarships – There are plenty of scholarships, grants, and matching grants available out there, you just need to apply.  In the coming months, North Side will have a matching grant fund available for prospective adoptive parents.  Before you apply for these scholarships though, these groups want to see you are being wise with the money you have right now.  They do NOT give away money to people who do not have a handle on their personal finances.

Yes, the cost associated with adoption is great, but the blessing is even greater!

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#2 Lil’ Agnew on the Way!

photo-6

Before Mailing Applications Months Ago

It’s true!  The Agnews are expecting baby #2!  We have been trying to keep things quiet for a while now, but we had to inform some people, and I think some got a little overambitious with who they told and it seems that the word is getting out.  This week, we have a had a few people ask us if we were expecting, and it seems that one person only told one person who only told one person and so on and so on.  So, this is a little earlier then we wanted to make the big announcment, but we are still thrilled to share this blessed news!

The reason we wanted to wait is because we still have approximately 12 months to go.

We are expecting a precious baby.  But we are expecting that baby from Ethiopia.

As of right now, our child is growing in a tummy over in Ethiopia.  While we don’t know exactly how this story will play out, this baby will be orphaned in the months to come.  The child’s mother may die or may abandon the child for different reasons.  All we know of the story right now is that God has set it up from the beginning of time for us to raise this child and now has called us to rescue that baby, and we have said yes.

God put many different things in our path to lead us to this decision.  We always knew we wanted to adopt in the States and out of the States, and we had a particular passion for children overseas due to some of the unfortunate spiritual and physical environments.  We always knew we would do it one day, but the dilemma arose back in February when I was at Southern Seminary for a doctoral seminar and three visiting professors that week had all recently adopted internationally.  I began to talk to them about their experiences and God started progressing my heart quicker than I anticipated.  As I asked for their advice, they directed me towards Ethiopia (for reasons I’ll explain later).

I called Amanda that night from my hotel room in Louisville.  As we both looked at pictures and the information concerning the state of children in Ethiopia, we wept over the phone together due to the dismal state of the millions of orphans in this world.  We prayed that God would give us direction, and we began to pray that if God willed it, he would provide all the resources needed.

That night, we didn’t know how close we were to actually going through with this, but Amanda said something over the phone that sealed the deal for me.  ”Travis, I keep thinking about these precious orphans without a mom or a dad, and all I can think of is we have an extra bed.  Right now, we have an extra bed.”

The extra bed.  That’s all I needed.  Did I have concerns?  Sure, my mind was flooded with thoughts of what people in the South would think about us calling a black child our own.  I have heard stately “gentlemen” and Southern belles demean precious children of God belonging to another race.  I was well aware of the huge financial commitment.  We did not have trouble conceiving a child, so I knew some people wouldn’t understand why we were doing this and not just keep making babies who we were knowledgeable concerning the DNA.  I knew that we would deal with long nights of trying to convince a hysterical child that he or she is no longer alone.

But we had an extra bed.

Many people will probably question the timing of this (among many other things that I hope to address in the weeks to come).  Why wouldn’t we have all of our “real” children and do something like this later?  Why wouldn’t we wait until we had a greater amount of money stockpiled in savings?  I have talked with people who wonder if this is the “perfect” time to do this.

Is this the perfect time for us?  Probably not, but it is the perfect time for one orphan.

And while we can’t do something about all the orphans of the world, we can do something about that one.  We have an extra bed.

I plan on sharing more in the days to come about our journey, where we are, what God is teaching us, and our answers to some of the questions we have received.  But today, I’m overjoyed.  I can finally shout it from the mountaintops: We have a baby on the way.  That baby might still be 12 months away, maybe more, maybe less.  But that’s our baby.  That precious baby will be ours as much as Obadiah is ours.  I can’t wait to get on a plane and rescue that child and say, “It’s all over.  You’re finally home.  You are loved.  You are safe in your father’s arms.”

That sounds like my story of how God rescued me.  I can’t wait for this journey, and I appreciate you praying for the health of our baby and the quick processing of our paperwork so we can get that child in our arms.

I am so thankful today that we have an extra bed.

For now…

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