What Eli Has Already Taught His Dad

Eli is still weeks away from coming home, yet he has already taught me, his father, so much.  If you didn’t get to catch his story, you can do so here.  The short version is God has called Amanda and I to adopt an orphan from Ethiopia who has some special needs.  Due to severe malnourishment, he has some delayed milestones.

When we thought through possibilities, we became overwhelmed.  When we prayed through opportunities, we became peaceful.  Amanda had been praying to meet the needs of a child that was even more overlooked than other orphans.  I wasn’t there yet.  My line of reasoning was such: “If we don’t accept the child matched with us, that child will wind up on a waiting list.  We don’t know what we are getting into with a waiting child.”

Everything changed when we heard about Eli.

When we began to talk to ourselves, other people, and professionals in their respective fields, I realized something about myself and most people: We all want to see the needs of the world met, yet we rarely want them met through our own hands.

Every one with whom we talked was concerned over Eli’s state.  If you see his pictures in the orphanage, your heart literally breaks in two.  The look in his eyes cries hopelessness.  Anyone who heard his story or saw his pictures became brokenhearted.  His parents died so early.  He hasn’t had enough to eat.  His life has been absent of stability.  Everyone felt pity for him.

But no one wanted responsibility for him.

I have to admit, I would have slept better at night if someone would have told me, “Don’t worry about Eli, someone else has agreed to take care of him.”  I would have uttered a sigh of relief, felt better about the world, and gone about my merry way.

Why?  Because I honestly want him to have a better life, but I didn’t want my life affected in the process.  I would feel better if he was taken care of just as long as it didn’t affect my comfort.  We want peace on earth without it disrupting our lives.  We don’t want to take risks.  We want to help someone without getting dirty.  Meet the needs of the world at arm’s lengths.

Eli has taught me so much already.  He is pushing me to be more like Christ.  I can’t just hurt for the needs of others, I need to hurt with the needs of others.  My hands must begin to match up with my heart.  I want to see the needs of the world met, yet I rarely want them met through my own hands.

11 thoughts on “What Eli Has Already Taught His Dad”

  1. Thank you for your wise words, Trav. You and Amanda are going to be the perfect parents for Eli. God has such a masterful plan. And you are so right when you say that so many of us so many times "feel" sorry for or hurt for others, whether they be orphans or underprivileged children, mentally handicapped, the list goes on but we never put hands to what we are feeling. Thank you for reminding me of that. Can't wait to meet this very special child God has placed in your care.

  2. Thank you for your wise words, Trav. You and Amanda are going to be the perfect parents for Eli. God has such a masterful plan. And you are so right when you say that so many of us so many times "feel" sorry for or hurt for others, whether they be orphans or underprivileged​ children, mentally handicapped, the list goes on but we never put hands to what we are feeling. Thank you for reminding me of that. Can't wait to meet this very special child God has placed in your care.

  3. Thank you for your wise words, Trav. You and Amanda are going to be the perfect parents for Eli. God has such a masterful plan. And you are so right when you say that so many of us so many times "feel" sorry for or hurt for others, whether they be orphans or underprivileged children, mentally handicapped, the list goes on but we never put hands to what we are feeling. Thank you for reminding me of that. Can't wait to meet this very special child God has placed in your

  4. Thanks so much for this, Travis. Our 3 year old was drug and alcohol exposed and has tough issues stemming from that. I won't go into details, but we get discouraged because she takes so much time and energy that we feel like our other children get "jipped." Your post encouraged me that 1) We're not the only ones dealing with these tough issues and 2) Someone has to take care of these babies, and we're thankful that God chose us as her parents. You'd think we already knew that, but it's easy to get discouraged and forget in the moment. So, anyhow, thanks. Have you heard any more abou

  5. Thank you for your wise words, Trav. You and Amanda are going to be the perfect parents for Eli. God has such a masterful plan. And you are so right when you say that so many of us so many times "feel" sorry for or hurt for others, whether they be orphans or underprivileged children, mentally handicapped, the list goes on but we never put hands to what we are feeling. Thank you for reminding me of that. Can't wait to meet this very special child God has placed in your care.

  6. Thanks so much for this, Travis. Our 3 year old was drug and alcohol exposed and has tough issues stemming from that. I won't go into details, but we get discouraged because she takes so much time and energy that we feel like our other children get "jipped." Your post encouraged me that 1) We're not the only ones dealing with these tough issues and 2) Someone has to take care of these babies, and we're thankful that God chose us as her parents. You'd think we already knew that, but it's easy to get discouraged and forget in the moment. So, anyhow, thanks. Have you heard any more about Eli?

  7. Travis to be so transparent with your words continues to bring tears to my eyes. Thank you for being so real and honest

  8. Ouch, Travis, my toes hurt…really bad! That last line up there sliced right to the core of my being. I became enamored with adoption after reading Pat Williams’ book “Ahead of the Game.” He has 14 adopted children and has four birth children – he claims not which 14 are adopted! But I have yet to actually MOVE in that direction. Thanks for using toe pain to move in the right direction!

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