Recently, I was talking to a buddy about why or why not men’s ministries work in certain churches. I tried to condense what we talked about, so here is a list of 10 things that will kill your church’s men’s ministry:
1. Hypocritical Leadership – You won’t find perfect men to lead your men’s ministry, but you better find men who are consistently striving towards godliness. Men can spot fakes easily and provides easy excuses for them.
2. Getting Too Close and Personal – You need to allow them to get close, but don’t force them to act in a manner against God-given manliness. Your group can be spiritual without group hugs.
3. Not Getting Close and Personal Enough – While you don’t force men to be something they are not, don’t also settle for anything less than biblical community. They need to be close enough to push each other to love and good deeds (Heb. 10:24-25).
4. Cliques – When men come to your church’s functions, you need to remove the clique factor among them. Make sure to get men with the gift of hospitality (that just means they make people feel welcome) at your doors and get men connected with others in the room.
5. Trying to Copy the Church’s Women Ministry – Just because your church’s women ministry has a hanging of the greens doesn’t mean you get your guys to decorate the church too. It works cause it is for women. Let guys be guys while always challenging them to be men of God.
6. Keeping Men from Their Families – Don’t require such a commitment from men at your church that they can’t fulfill their roles as a husband and father. While most men are off work in the evenings on the weekends, respect that their families need them to apply what they are learning and not always be absent in the home to be present in the church buildings.
7. Lowering the Standard – Just because your men aren’t stepping up does not mean that you lower the standard. Men rise up to the challenge, just raise the bar to where God expects and hold your men accountable.
8. Lack of Hands-On Application – Men are fixers, so do not emotionally motivate them to change without giving them practical steps to implement. Give them opportunities to meet needs and to give sacrificially. Why some men don’t get involved in church is they perceive a lot of talking without action. Get them moving!
9. Lack of Quality – Men can handle things that aren’t their preference as long as it is quality. Don’t halfway do programs, lead in an excellent manner and they will follow with excellence.
10. Pride – Since pride is the cause of every subsequent sin, your group must relentlessly discourage arrogant, prideful comparison. Teach your men to be like Jesus who was both bold and humble.