This week’s book of the week is Rocking the Roles by Robert Lewis and William Hendricks.  I just realized that Lewis is the man who wrote the curriculum for Men’s Fraternity which I have been learning a ton from these last few months.  This book serves to clarify what the Bible says about the roles of husband and wife.

This book is full of great liners and great conversation starters for couples, but I extremely benefited from one section that got practical on what it meant for a husband to “lead” the home.  This book does not devalue women at all, but it brings a lot of things into balance.  Men, read this list provided in the book and find an area or two (or 25) that you need to work on.  Women, read this list and gauge the benefits of having a husband like this.

25 Ways a Husband is to Be a Servant-Leader.  A Servant Leader:

  1. includes his wife in envisioning the future.
  2. accepts spiritual responsibility for his family.
  3. is willing to say “I’m sorry” and “forgive me” to his family.
  4. discusses household responsibilities with his wife and makes sure these are fairly distributed.
  5. seeks the consultation of his wife on all major financial decisions.
  6. follows through with commitments he has made to his wife.
  7. anticipates the different stages his marriage will pass through.
  8. anticipates the stages his children will pass through.
  9. frequently tells his wife what he likes about her.
  10. provides financially for his family’s basic living expenses.
  11. deals with distractions so that he can talk with his wife and family.
  12. prays with his wife on a regular basis.
  13. initiates meaningful family traditions.
  14. initiates fun outings for the family on a monthly basis, or even more often.
  15. takes the time to give his children practical instruction about life, which in turn gives them confidence with their peers.
  16. goes over the upcoming week with his wife to clarify their schedule and anticipate any pressure points.
  17. keeps the family out of debt.
  18. makes sure he and his wife have drawn up a will and arranged a well-conceived plan for their children in case of death.
  19. lets his children into the interior of his life.
  20. praises his wife often in public.
  21. explains sex to each child in a way that gives him or her a wholesome perspective.
  22. encourages his wife to grow as an individual.
  23. takes the lead in establishing with his wife clear and well-reasoned household convictions on moral issues.
  24. joins a small group of men who are dedicated to improving their skills as husbands and fathers.
  25. provides time for his wife to pursue personal interests.

Do you agree with this list?  Anything that this list is missing?  Any toes hurting out there?  Mine are.  I’ve got some work to do.

Travis Agnew is a Christian, husband, father, pastor, author, blogger, and religion instructor.