One of the biggest decisions you will make in college is not your major, your career path, or even who you date. It is who you allow closest to you.
Over the years, I have watched countless students arrive on campus with a sincere desire to follow Jesus. They were active in church, excited about their faith, and determined to live differently. Yet by the time graduation arrived, some were walking closely with Christ while others had drifted far away.
I used to wonder why.
Several years ago, while talking with students at a college event, I noticed a pattern. Many of the students who had once been growing spiritually were no longer pursuing Christ. At first, I looked for complicated explanations, but the answer was surprisingly simple. Most of them had surrounded themselves with people who did not value Jesus. Their closest friendships slowly shaped their beliefs, habits, and priorities.
Then I thought about the students who were thriving spiritually. They came from different backgrounds and had different personalities, but they shared one thing in common.
The people closest to them were helping them move closer to God.
Psalm 1 describes this progression well. The psalmist warns against walking in the counsel of the wicked, standing in the way of sinners, and sitting in the seat of scoffers. Notice how gradual it is. It starts by listening to the wrong voices. Then it becomes spending time with the wrong influences. Eventually, it becomes identifying with them.
Very few people intentionally walk away from their faith. Most simply drift. They allow the wrong people to shape their thinking until they end up somewhere they never planned to go.
That is why Proverbs 13:20 says, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” The people closest to you will influence who you become. Their priorities become your priorities. Their values become your values. Their direction often becomes your direction.
Some people respond by pointing out that Jesus was a friend of sinners. He certainly was. Jesus intentionally spent time with people far from God because He came to save them. But while sinners were often the focus of His ministry, they were not the center of His inner circle. The people closest to Jesus were people pursuing the Father’s will alongside Him.
The lesson is not that Christians should avoid unbelievers. We are called to love people, build relationships, and share the gospel. The lesson is that the people with the greatest influence on your life should be helping you follow Jesus more faithfully.
Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Every close relationship in your life is doing one of two things. It is sharpening you or dulling you. There is no middle ground.
Some people challenge you to grow spiritually, while others make compromise seem normal.
Take a moment and think about your closest friends. Who influences your decisions? Who shapes your thinking? Who do you spend the most time with?
Five years from now, you will likely be more like those people than you realize.
Choose your friends before they choose your future. If you want to stay close to Jesus, make sure the people closest to you are moving closer to Him as well.
